When I was about 11 years old, I would sit and dream of the day when I would be old enough to drive.... O MAN! The freedoms that would come with my ability to drive! I knew I would have it all if only I have the opportunity to drive.
It seemed FOREVER away and I remember my mother would say to me "it'll be here soon enough, patience..". In my head I would think "yeah, mom... sure is taking its time to get here!".
Then my 16th birthday arrived.. FINALLY, I was able to DRIVE! The weird thing was, even though yes, there was freedom in driving, I also inherited these crazy things called bills. Gas, insurance, oil changes, washer fluid, the list seemed endless. Even so, I found myself looking ahead to even MORE freedom, turning 18! Then I could do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted... that was when it would all be perfect! I couldn't WAIT to graduate high school and be a grown up.
The day after graduation, I moved out... I was an adult for crying out loud! I needed to enjoy my "rights" and "freedoms"! hmmmm.... now I had rent, electricity and plenty of other bills to add to my list and I found that this "freedom" wasn't quite "as advertised".
So here's the funny part, at this point I thought "I can't WAIT to get married!" sense a theme here?
This is how I lived the next few years of my life... couldn't wait to get married, got married at 19, couldn't wait to own a house, so bought a house, on and on...
So now I am this thing called an adult and I look back wondering, WHY?
Why was I in such a hurry to get to the next stage?
Why didn't I enjoy where I was?
Part of this may be personality, part is just human nature I suppose.
Either way... once I became a parent, and there were all these milestones close together as I watched our babies grow, time suddenly reversed... it was going TOO FAST!
I realized I'm an adult but now what?
This is not all it was cracked up to be!
I don't have the wisdom I thought I would have at this point.
I don't have it "easy peasy" like I imagined in my young girl days.
With the freedom of doing what I want when I want, comes responsibility that really changes the whole meaning of "freedoms".
With each stage, there are new joys, but new pressures, worries and so on.
When you are SO focused on what's next, you sometimes miss out on what is NOW.
This little rambling stems from the other day, when my little girl, who has just turned 5, who, in my head is still a baby says, "Mommy, when will I be a grown up just like you?"
I reply, "soon enough sweetie, soon enough".
This is when irony smiles on me... she says "that will take FOREEEEEVER!"
No sweetie, actually it doesn't take that long.
It seemed FOREVER away and I remember my mother would say to me "it'll be here soon enough, patience..". In my head I would think "yeah, mom... sure is taking its time to get here!".
Then my 16th birthday arrived.. FINALLY, I was able to DRIVE! The weird thing was, even though yes, there was freedom in driving, I also inherited these crazy things called bills. Gas, insurance, oil changes, washer fluid, the list seemed endless. Even so, I found myself looking ahead to even MORE freedom, turning 18! Then I could do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted... that was when it would all be perfect! I couldn't WAIT to graduate high school and be a grown up.
The day after graduation, I moved out... I was an adult for crying out loud! I needed to enjoy my "rights" and "freedoms"! hmmmm.... now I had rent, electricity and plenty of other bills to add to my list and I found that this "freedom" wasn't quite "as advertised".
So here's the funny part, at this point I thought "I can't WAIT to get married!" sense a theme here?
This is how I lived the next few years of my life... couldn't wait to get married, got married at 19, couldn't wait to own a house, so bought a house, on and on...
So now I am this thing called an adult and I look back wondering, WHY?
Why was I in such a hurry to get to the next stage?
Why didn't I enjoy where I was?
Part of this may be personality, part is just human nature I suppose.
Either way... once I became a parent, and there were all these milestones close together as I watched our babies grow, time suddenly reversed... it was going TOO FAST!
I realized I'm an adult but now what?
This is not all it was cracked up to be!
I don't have the wisdom I thought I would have at this point.
I don't have it "easy peasy" like I imagined in my young girl days.
With the freedom of doing what I want when I want, comes responsibility that really changes the whole meaning of "freedoms".
With each stage, there are new joys, but new pressures, worries and so on.
When you are SO focused on what's next, you sometimes miss out on what is NOW.
This little rambling stems from the other day, when my little girl, who has just turned 5, who, in my head is still a baby says, "Mommy, when will I be a grown up just like you?"
I reply, "soon enough sweetie, soon enough".
This is when irony smiles on me... she says "that will take FOREEEEEVER!"
No sweetie, actually it doesn't take that long.
Nicely put! Sounds just like me. I'm trying to learn to enjoy the moment! They are just flying by so fast I get dizzy some days! :)
ReplyDeleteNicely put! Sounds just like me. I'm trying to learn to enjoy the moment! They are just flying by so fast I get dizzy some days! :)
ReplyDeleteThere is so much more joy in living in the moment then always looking ahead.... not always easy though. :) thanks for reading!
DeleteAnd there's no place you can go to turn in your resignation -- once you're an adult, you can't go back! It seems like it takes the rest of your life to learn how to live IN THE MOMENT! We have to stop looking for the next thing that will make us happy . . . it's about learning to live in the moment. And then . . . it goes so fast, like you said!
ReplyDeleteSo true! :) Sometimes we wish we COULD resign and go back a little ways! :) Thanks for reading!
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