I get his sour cream and lemons

"Want my lemon?"

He used to always ask this when his iced tea came with lemon.

He doesn't like it, but I love lemon in my water.

"Want my sour cream?"

He doesn't like sour cream, and when it came on a dish he had ordered, he would ask if I wanted it.

The other day, we were at a restaurant and I had to go to the bathroom.

When I came back to the table, I noticed in my absence, he had put his lemon in my water and sour cream on my enchiladas.

No longer any need to ask.

He knows me that well.

When you are married a long time, there is a comfortable-ness that happens.

Sometimes this feels like something to be sad about, like your relationship has become almost boring.

There is an excitement in the beginning of any new relationship that is special.

Learning all about a new person, having them care to learn about you, is special and fun!

Sometimes, when watching a romantic scene or movie, there is this thought, "I miss those days of butterflies and new romance!"

It can be easy to go to a wedding and see new love and feel a little sadness that those days are in the past for yourself.

We can remember the love notes and messages of missing one another in the beginning, and feel a little sorrow that it is long ago for us.

Let me tell you something.

Enduring life's struggles and hardships with your best friend is an invaluable gift.

Going through your worst times, your lowest points, and knowing your person is still there: that's the good stuff.

Little things like knowing what they like or dislike, knowing by the look in their eyes what they are thinking, those are priceless little things.

They may seem mundane, but they only happen with years of commitment and attention to one another.

When two become one, there is a rhythm that is beautiful to witness, a unity the two might not even be aware of.

It can be taken for granted and even seen as something negative, but it's not.

Years of commitment, years of loving one another, creates something worth aspiring too, but it also doesn't mean things are always wonderful.

Ever tried helping your spouse back a trailer into a tiny campsite?

What about moving a large piece of furniture?

I can move any size or shape of furniture with my sister and we will do it almost flawlessly.

With my husband, who knows me better than anyone, whose face I can read better than a book; we can't move anything without some frustration with each other.

The irony of it all, is that by the time we get it moved, we have done so in the way I would have done it without him barking orders at me. The same way he WANTED it moved in the first place, but failed to communicate effectively.

The breakdown in communication in these instances seems almost to contradict the oneness of the relationship, but yet inevitably happens. Every time.

When we were first married, I struggled with extreme insecurity and sense of worthiness.

I had a hard time accepting that he truly loved me or that I was even worthy of that kind of love.

Year after year, struggle after struggle, disappointment after disappointment (because let's face it, we as humans screw up a LOT!), he stayed. His commitment to me, his staying even when it wasn't easy, proved his love.

Time allowed me to trust his love and commitment.

With time, we learned, (who am I kidding, we are still learning this!) how to communicate effectively with each other and appreciate the ability to count on one another.

Time allows us to know that those moments of miscommunication and frustration pass and are nothing in the big picture.

Time teaches us that there is no one else we would want to face life with.

With time too, you learn to notice the little gestures of love.

Yea, they might look different than they did in the beginning, but they are still acts of love.

Acts of love can look like this:

Playing your favorite song when you get in the car.

Making your steak the way you like it, even if he thinks it's ruining it.

Wearing the shirt you like him to wear, even though he doesn't think it's comfortable.

Giving you his lemon and sour cream.

They might not sound romantic, and they certainly don't show up in romance novels or movies, but they are acts of love that are worthy of mention and appreciation.

I may sometimes miss those early days of anxiously awaiting his arrival, phone call or love notes...

But I am so thankful for this time in our story, where he knows he can give me his lemon and sour cream without even asking.

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